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12 September 2006 @ 06:57 pm

Cypher: Why oh why didn't I take the blue pill?

watch this first: ! : http://www.endofworld.net/

Perspective people

(warning, satirical in nature - possibly political, slightly offensive and definatly includes french bashing) (well not really, I love the french, they're just - too easy).

Have you heard the news? You're all going to DIE!

Well, that's what they keep telling us anyway. 

Between the Environmentalists, the Politicians and Astronomers we're definatly going to die - great. 

The good news is that there are options. (I like options, choice is good)

Option A is particulary great. 

Bascially we're fucked. 

Asteroid *boom* 

Sun *boom* 

nearby sun *boom* 

alien space craft "you suck!" then *boom* 

solar flare *wimper* 

unforseen event *BOOM!*

Human civilisation ends. Oh well... too bad. Thanks for playing, 'instant death! The universe bites back.'

So for the purposes of this argument, we're going to write off option A.

Option B is da icecaps melting (well technically they'll re-freeze in another thousand years or so, well, i guess that makes it 'global freezing...' maybe i'll invest in realestate on the continental shelf just off sydney.)

Anyway, they're going to melt because we burn lots and lots of dead stuff, the best solution is of course, to switch to nuclear energy, BUT NO! That would be 'harmful' and 'dangerous'. LOOK INTO FUCKING SKY AND YOU WILL FIND THAT WE ARE IN ORBIT AROUND  A HUGE FUCKING NUCLEAR REACTOR! (but of course, nuclear energy is unnatural and evil.)

Right - so we switch to nuclear power. Fabulous. Now that wonderful, very large, very inconspicous super volcano at yellowstone national park decides that today is just the perfect day to go BOOM.

*It goes boom*

Pulverisation. Orbit Disrupted - fall into sun - very hot, very bad. oh well, nuclear energy was a nice thought.

so - are we going resign ourselves to our fate and wait for these eventualities to occur? 


We're going to do it our fucking selves! 

I'm going to go and make a bomb, (which is going to be ten billion times bigger than yours) and blow shit up. I think that's a viable solution to our extinction problem. Why muck about? Being human is all about having control. And that is control. He who dies with the most toys WINS and I'm going to win so VAH! 

(And the microbes inherit the earth).

(The viruses can come too).

ATTENTION ALL HUMAN CONTROL DUDES: You live on a rock (a small one) in the middle of fucking no-where. Get some FUCKING perspective.

*sigh* I'm so sick of people who can't look up and go, "Oh, look, we're small aren't we?"

huskerslaurahuskerslaura on September 13th, 2006 12:39 am (UTC)
*hugs ellymelly for the funny*

made my day.

have a cookie? *offers tin*
ellymelly: chamalla and vodkaellymelly on September 13th, 2006 01:50 am (UTC)
omg lmao - i didn't actually expect anyone to respond to this because i was 'venting' :D hehe *takes a cookie* *GRIN*